Cafe Rio Please

Dear Bob,

This past weekend my friends and I were lamenting over the fact that we have to plan trips to Utah in order to partake of the food that haunts our dreams. You know what we are talking about don't you....... Cafe Rio.
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We are crossing our fingers and toes that you will hear our cries and visit the town that has your most devoted fans --- Temecula, California. Ask any Latter-Day Saint here (and there are many) about the first place they go when they make a pit stop in St. George. It's Cafe Rio, Bob.... Cafe Rio. And if that's not enough, ask them about their last stop as they depart for home. It's Cafe Rio (and sometimes a little venture to Nielsen's Frozen Custard if you are out of Key Lime Pie, which has happened on one or two occasions). And speaking of pit stops...... more stalls please. There always seems to be a long line with all those big families on your premises.
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We know Cafe Rio has set down roots along the California Coast.... but that's just not good enough. It requires a trip along the 91 freeway, and we don't like traveling along the 91! We would rather drive to Utah, or Arizona, or Las Vegas! We Temeculites need our very own Cafe Rio, where we can meet friends for lunch, and dine with our families. We need Key Lime pie at all hours.

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I hear from your neighbors Nina and Grant Beutler (whom I happen to know very well), that you have a sign in your kitchen that says "When Pigs Fly." I hope that is not what you are thinking right at this moment. Pigs don't fly here Bob, but there have been occasions where "Hell has frozen over." I have proof -- a photo of my kids outside rolling a snow man in our back yard.

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Since I am your long time friend (a person who knows what it means to "take a gamble and lose"), your former fake wife (at the Polynesian Cultural Center), and faithful backup singer when you played Gordon Lightfoot tunes on the guitar.... I think you should pay heed to my request. My family is getting mighty tired of my poor attempts to recreate Pork Barbacoa. "It's just not the same" they cry -- each and every time I stick a pork butt in the crock pot. It's true Bob.... it's just not the same.
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I can promise you that you would have a line of eager employees -- the young men and young women of the Redhawk Ward just to name a few; as well as eager guests craving Fideo and Salmon Tacos.
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If you are looking for the perfect location, check out the vacant strip centers along Temecula Parkway. It's perfect because it's just down the road from my house and all of your future employees (Claire and Eden Beutler.... plus friends) could walk to work. See.... I've thought of everything.
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We love Cafe Rio, and to prove it, I'm asking all my Temecula friends to unite and leave a comment to this post so that you can see I'm not writing this letter for selfish reasons. It's for all of us who suffer from Cafe Rio withdrawals. (Now is your chance Temecula.... beg like you've never begged before!)
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Your devoted friend, and little sister of 1976,

Crystal

P.S. I apologize to my fellow Temeculites for referring to our beautiful town as "Hell." It's really heaven, but I thought the phase was useful in this letter, don't you?

A Nose that Knows

Tonight when I got home from a church youth activity, I walked in my front door and was hit with the smell of hard boiled eggs. So..... disgusting! It might have something to do with the fact that I did make a few hard boiled eggs today (for the dog who's recovering from who knows what). That smell is enough to make you not like your house. It's enough to make me want to stay in a hotel over night (although I can pretty much be talked into that any old time!) I'm just oh so thankful that my friend Rachel, who has an aversion to anything egg, was not with me when I walked through the door. She would have dumped me right then and there.

It's time to pull out my secret weapon..... the Volcano candle from Anthropologie. Pure heaven. The minute the wick is set to flame I am in a good mood. Have you ever smelled this candle? If not, you have to try it out the next time you pay a visit to Anthro -- you will LOVE it. LOVE it I tell you! It even comes in a beautiful jar that you can reuse. And I have to add that it does not smell all flowery -- it smells fruity like Jamba Juice. I'm not into flowery smells -- they remind me of my grandma's bathroom spray from 1979.

You can check it out here -- but I'm sorry to say .... you can't smell it. I'd post a beautiful picture of the candle, but Anthropologie is a little stingy -- they won't let you copy pictures from their web site which bothers me a bit because I am a good customer. I think good customers should be allowed to copy pictures so they can rave about products, don't you??? Not a smart move if you ask me ... but they didn't ask me.... that's the problem.

I'll post a picture of MY personal candle tomorrow -- right now it's dark outside and I should be in bed!

Blurred

This morning I slept through my alarm, which is always alarming. I have to drive a carpool of kids to school! Pounding rain kept me awake throughout the night, and it wasn't until the pre-dawn hours that I hit R.E.M. mode. This morning, my alarm was Eden who screamed "Mom, get up, we are going to be late!!!" I jumped out of bed in search of my glasses, and as my hand was feeling around for them in the drawer, I saw this:

A brightly colored package!!! I was elated because I thought Matt had given me a gift before leaving on a ski trip to Canada with his best friend Clarence. Warm feelings flowed through my veins as I thought to myself:

"That is so nice!!! ....
And, so romantic!!! ...
And, so unexpected!!! ...
And so out of character! ...

What possessed Matt to leave me a gift?"

I found my glasses and put them on so that I could open my present. I could hardly wait! With glasses in place, I looked again .......





Not what I expected... no sir! Apparently, I forgot to put the sundries I had purchased the day before away in their proper place under the sink.

Sometimes my life is a little more interesting out of focus. But..... you just never know.... maybe Matt will read this post and bring me home a souvenir.

Apology

Dear Elfie,

I am sorry I said I didn't like you. I didn't know that you were sick and needed to go to the vet. I hope the doctors were nice to you during your weekend stay at the hospital -- considering the bill was over $2,000.00 I'm assuming that you stayed in the Presidential Suite and ate caviar for every meal.

I hope you get better soon. It makes me sad to see you sitting on the floor staring into space.

Love,

Crystal

Random Thoughts About January 21st - Not Necessarily In Order

I dislike dogs today.

There was not an umbrella in site when I dropped kids off in front of the school, even though it was raining hard. I find that weird.

Elfie threw up on me this morning while I was sleeping. Way worse than a sick baby.... way worse.

Remind Matt not to leave beef jerkey in his coat pockets.

I love days when it is so dark outside, the street lights are on during the day. Today is that kind of day.

The Dogs do not like going outside to do their business on rainy days.

I had to hunt for snow chains today in the pouring rain. I hated it because it involved going to the auto parts store that smells like motor oil. There were no snow chains.... which made it that much worse.

I do not like cleaning up "dog-do" when Elfie's sick and it's all over the house. It made me thankful for janitors... and Matt (my janitor).

Ask Claire and Eden why teenagers consider it nerdy to carry an umbrella at school, even when it is raining buckets.

It is not fun to visit Costoco in the middle of a downpour. But the samples were extra good today, especially the sundried tomato hummus.

There are violets blooming in my back yard. I love violets almost as much as I love lilacs.

I wonder if Ferris and Clarence are laughing as they ski down the mountains of Canada today. I hope they are having fun.

Giveaway

Want some free jewelry??? I'm giving away a necklace this week. You can enter to win here!

Good luck!

Blustery Day

This morning, I got up early to take Claire to the orthodontist. As I was getting dressed I looked out the window to diagnose the weather conditions -- part of my daily ritual to determine just what I should wear. The sky was grey, and the wind was blowing. It was a blustery day. I don't get to that utter that phrase often in my neck of the woods, which is a shame because it reminds me of the days when my kids were were in love with A.A. Milne's Winnie the Pooh (not to be confused with Disney's Winnie the Pooh.) Most days in the land of Southern California, it's blue skies with a little smog thrown in for good measure. Today, however, it was blustery, so I got to say "It's a blustery day" twice -- once to each of my kids, AND wear a long sleeve shirt under my short sleeve shirt. It was exciting to have a change.

When Claire and I got home from the orthodontist, it began to rain -- hard, and I was suddenly filled with dread because I had to make an afternoon trip to the post office. Then I remembered .... It's Martin Luther King Day, and the post office is closed, along with schools, which meant that I could have an entire day inside the house drinking hot chocolate and making soup! I was excited because it's not often that a blustery day coincides with a National Holiday. I went to my office with a cup of cocoa, and turned on Pandora -- my new favorite radio station, and settled in for a day of jewelry making while listening to moody ballads mingled with acoustical guitars.

It was a fine morning until I looked out the window a second time. My blustery day had turned into a torrential storm -- pounding rain and wind gales that blew the palm trees into the shape of inside-out umbrellas. As I sat there admiring Mother Nature's fury, I noticed that my 3 garbage cans had decided to set sail down the gutter. They looked like they were on their way to a party. Fleeing cans is not good in my neighborhood. Garbage can thievery is too tempting in weather like this, so I was forced out of my warm cocoon to perform an emergency rescue operation.

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I grabbed the only umbrella in the house -- (a Pokemon kiddie umbrella left over from Eden's 2005 umbrella phase), put on my flip flops, and headed outside. The minute I left the sidewalk, I was engulfed in the storm. My hair was glued in place by pouring rain; and my flip flops sank into a muddy mass that was once my lawn, and covered my feet with goo. That didn't last long because the goo washed away when I stepped off the curb and became part of the swiftly moving gutter water that was up to my knees. Before I knew it, I looked like a wet dog stuck in a river. I found myself wondering why I had worked so hard to get ready this morning -- when I knew it was going to be a blustery day.

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Next a tough battle over the cans ensued between me and the dastardly weather. I had to wrestle the wind one handed, as the other hand held on to an umbrella handle and a large diet Coke (which I had somehow forgotten to set down in my haste to rescue the cans.) I did it though. I single handedly saved the dumpsters, which have been returned to their place of honor in the side yard of the Beutler mansion. They looked a little sad sitting there empty in the pouring rain. I went inside victorious, sopping wet, still holding on to my soda. I didn't lose a drop.

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My neighbors did not fare as well -- their cans succeeded in their escape and are now having a big block party at the end of the street. I just hope they don't throw up all over the asphalt. You know how sloppy cans can be when they are at a party!

P.S. In honor of Dr. King's birthday, take a minute and listen to his speech "I Have a Dream" with your family. You can find it here.

Makeup Junkie

Today my daughter handed me a wad of bills. "I've been saving up Mom, take me to Sephora" she said as she slapped them on the table. I was impressed. There was a whole lot of cash sitting there in front of me. "Are you sure this is what you want to spend your money on?" I inquired. "Yes" she replied as she pulled me to my feet.

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So... we got in the car and we drove to the mall. We walked into Sephora and entered the big wonderful world of cosmetics. Perfumes mingling in the air, rows and rows of nail polish.... Claire's personal heaven. Every time I enter its doors I think to myself: "Mom would have loved this." My mom -- Georgia, was a makeup junkie. Fortunately, that gene did not pass on to me.... but it skipped a generation and is definitely in the DNA of my daughter.

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When I was little, my mom had a big bag full of makeup. The thing I coveted were the tiny Avon lipstick samples. I wanted those little white tubes of pinky goodness in the worst way. But it never happened -- that was my mom's treasure bag and she did not share it with anyone, including her sister Pam -- also a makeup junkie. She protected it like a pirate protects his booty, and I guess to her it was. It contained "Her Face."

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If you were to ask my kids: "What is the one thing you will always remember Jo Jo saying?" They will answer in unison: "I've got to go put on my face!" And then they will laugh, because they thought that was just about the funniest thing ever. My mom said it all the time. "Stay here kids and watch TV, I've got to go put on My Face." In about an hour she would return perfectly coiffed. She NEVER left the house without Her Face. Is that a term teenagers used in the 50's, or was that my mom's own invention? I'm not sure, but it's something my mom said until the day she died -- which was 4 years ago this month.

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My mom loved to shop, and when she invited me to spend an afternoon at the mall, I knew it would involve a lengthy visit to the cosmetic's counter of every major department store. The clerks all knew her by name. I had no interest in that kind of stuff. I'd rather invest in a pair of shoes, which is my personal passion, so I would wander off to the shoe department while my mom hung out at the cosmetic's counter and played with jar after jar of the latest creams, and foundations. At some point she would appear in Ladies Shoes with a small sack in her hands, and I knew that she had found another lipstick that she just had to add to her ever growing treasure trove. I would roll my eyes and then we would go for a Coke, something else she could not live without. (I blame her for my addiction).
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Now, it's Claire dragging me on these beauty missions. It brings back memories to see her wandering the isles sampling all the eye shadows and spraying all the perfumes. My mom would have loved spending the afternoon with Claire in Sephora. This is when I miss her most.

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Several years ago, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. She fought long and hard for 2 1/2 years, but in the end, the cancer won. I worry that this is going to happen to me. I worry that it is going to happen to Claire. But today, I found a little comfort in Sephora. I think my mom's spirit paid me a visit while Claire and I were on our cosmetics spree.

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As I wandered around killing time, I found something I really needed -- deodorant. It caught my eye because it smelled like grapefruit, which is a smell I just can't resist. When I looked at the label it said "Healthy -- all natural -- no chemicals, no aluminum." In my head I heard my mom's voice saying: "Buy this... one for you and one for Claire, because using deodorant with chemicals can cause breast cancer." So I did. I bought two sticks - one for me, and one for Claire. It was the price of a pair of shoes, but you know, I think it was worth it. The Makeup Junkie gave me good advise. I will sleep a little easier knowing that I'm not putting any harmful chemicals under my arms, which is where my mom found her lump.

I think you might like this too -- that is if you worry about this kind of thing. So, here's a picture just in case you think you might light a stick. It's safe, and it smells good.

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May the force of the Makeup Junkie be with you too! And remember ..... get a mammogram every year. Don't forget, because the Make-Up Junkie did, and it cost her - her life.

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Post Script: For those of you who are wondering what I thought about Lavanila.... it works just great in moderate weather. I made it through the entire day without smelling like B.O. I do think, however, that on a really hot day if you are outside, you might have to combine Lavanila with a Salt Crystal, which you can find here. Using both should probably do the job just fine, and both are chemical free.

Claire's photograph courtesy of the incredible Blue Lily.

For the Love of Books

Today is my favorite day of the month. In fact, the 2nd Tuesday of every month is my favorite day of the month. Are you wondering why.....???? Well, it just happens to be the day I go to "Book Club." Yes, it's true, I'm in a book club. I love to read.

I can remember vividly when my love affair with books began. It was in my grandma's bed at nap time. I loved listening to her soothing voice read stories about Swedish cowboys, a lazy beaver, and McElligot's Pool. It wasn't too long before I could read those books myself. It progressed from there and I've been hooked ever since. I owe it all to Nana and Dr. Seuss. Oh... and of course Mrs. Hopkins, my 1st grade teacher who had white hair and wore a hankie tucked in her wrist watch.

There is something wonderful about getting lost in a good story -- imagining what it's like to be a Geisha, or a librarian in Nazi Germany .... I love it. My personal favorites are historical fiction -- stories about women. If I pick up a book, I can't let it go until I am finished, which can be torture sometimes when I'm up at 3:00 a.m. with bloodshot eyes. Oh, I pay for it the next day, let me tell you!!! While I have been engrossed in a good read, a mysterious bomb goes off and reeks havoc in my house -- it's a huge mess! It takes a good two days to pay penance, but it is worth it.
My favorite date with my husband is a night at Barnes & Noble, which is ironic, because Matt does not like to read -- he prefers magazines. Nevertheless, we love spending hours wandering around looking at books --or magazines if you are Matt. (It doesn't hurt that there's a Starbucks right in the middle of the store where we can get a hot chocolate.) There is one book however, that Matt loved and that is Les Miserables by Victor Hugo. I gave it to him on our honeymoon which was a big mistake because he could not put that book down! But that's what a good story does .... it captivates you.

I had a teacher tell me that if my kids hated to read it was only because they had not connected with an author. She was right. Sometimes it takes a little searching to find stories that you like, but it can happen if you look hard enough. Here's proof: Eden. A professed "hater" of reading. That is until, he found the "Among the Hidden" series. He fell in love.

Let me tell you a little bit about my book club. We've been together a long, long time. Oh, we've broken up, and re-organized a few times, but somehow a core group of us have managed to continue on. When we first started, we were all young mother's with little babies. We met at night when husbands could stay home with kids. Now all of our kids are in school so we meet during the day.



At book club there is always amazing food, great conversation, and lots of laughter. Sometimes we even manage to have an interesting discussion about the book. Were it not for book club I never would have known that I not only love historical fiction, I love mysteries, and humor, and self help books too! My friends connected me with new authors. But the most important thing about book club is this: Friendship, and the time it gives us to be together. I love these women. They are dear friends. And truly, it doesn't matter if they read the book, or serve cereal when it's their turn to host, book club is always fun.

This month, Bobette was our hostess. It was amazing -- the food and the book. Thank you for the Valentine and an incredible brunch Bobette. You were good to us. Please, please, please can I have the recipe for the Goat Cheese Souffle'?

Post Script: If you are looking for a good read, click here. If you have read a good book lately and want to share, leave a comment!

Cravings

Do you ever have those days when you are just dying to eat something that you cannot have? I'm just wishing and wishing that I could have a sandwich. Are you thinking ..... "Go make one!!" Well, I'm not wishing for just any sandwich. I want a Smoked House Turkey with melted cheddar and sun dried tomato mustard from Panera Bakery. Heaven on French Bread .... that's all I have to say about that! Do you have a Panera Bakery near you? If so, then I am jealous because if I want this sandwich, I have to drive at least an hour to get one. Today, it's just not in the cards. But I'm stilling wishing.... yes I am. Maybe I will have to come and visit you and we can go to lunch!

What's your favorite sandwich??????

Nightmares and Sounds in the Night

Last night was strange..... so strange. I had spent the entire day watching movies (something I don't normally do) -- 3 hours of Avatar followed by Mexican food. Then another 2 1/2 hours of Harry Potter. Then sleep.

It takes me forever to fall asleep. I'm not sure why -- people tell me it happens during those menopause years and warn that it gets worse. I really don't appreciate hearing: "It gets worse." It's already "THEE worst!" Anyway, I had just drifted off -- at about 1:30 p.m., when I heard a loud crash, followed by breaking items, followed by yelping dogs. I sat straight up in bed with my heart racing. It scared me to death. Then I heard Matt making his prowler rounds: check all the doors, check the kids, check all the rooms, check in the garage. I just settled back down to get ready for another round of trying to fall asleep when Matt walked by. I said "Did you find anything?" "Nope", he said. Then in unison we both chimed "That was so weird." He went downstairs to sleep on the couch because apparently, I snore. (Embarrassing thing to admit, but sadly, true.)

Not long after that, at about 3:30, I heard a piercing scream, followed by barking dogs. I sat straight up in bed, heart pounding worse than before, still listening to the screaming which was coming from MY mouth!!! It was me! I was the screamer!!! The entire house was up again (except for Claire who sleeps like a log). My heart was racing and I yelled to all: "It was me! Don't worry everyone. It was me, having a nightmare."

"I heard more breaking" yelled Matt from down below.

"No, that was me screaming" I yelled in response. "Go back to sleep," which we all tried to do, but not very well. It was a long, long night.

The thing is...... NEVER, in my life, have I awakened screaming. Never. And here's the other thing.... I am an avid dreamer. I remember all sorts of things about dreams . I can remember dreams from when I was little. My dreams have color and sometimes even smells. Once I dreamed that package of bacon chasing me like snakes. I could smell the bacon! But this time .... I remember nothing but the color orange. Nothing!!! Why was I screaming like that??? Isn't it weird??

I blame the screaming on watching too many movies and the fact that Avatar, made me so nauseous that I had to leave the theatre just at the climax of the film. Waaaaaay too much movement for me. I also blame the Mexican food chaser and Harry Potter. What was I thinking!!!!!! (But.... let it be known, that Avatar is a semi good flick.... and Harry Potter is a great one.)

And as for the crash.... I blame removable adhesive picture hangers. Never use them. Especially on small antique book plates from Czechoslovakia that cost you a small fortune to frame. It fell off the bathroom wall.

P.S. I really look like this woman when I wake up in the middle of the night screaming. I believe in good grooming at all times.

Paradigm Shift

I have lived in Temecula for 12 years now. Twelve years. That's a long time to live in one place. Within a year or two of moving here, I discovered something marvelous about my neighborhood: there are things that I can count on. Predictable things that happen every day -- like clock work.

It begins in the morning as I pull my car out of my driveway. Eden is in the front row passenger's seat. As we round the corner, he says under his breath in a Napoleon Dynamite-ish sort of way: "Yes!" He says that because he sees the boy who waters his lawn every morning. He stands in the exact same place at the edge his yard with a garden hose in his hands, and gives us a friendly nod as we drive up the hill. Actually, Lawn Boy is now Lawn Guy. He began watering just after his family moved into the neighborhood. He was about 9 years old then. Now he's about 20.... and he's still watering.... every day (except maybe Sunday and incliment weather, which we also count on.) I wonder as we pass...... "Why is he watering when he should be in school? Why doesn't he just turn on the sprinklers?" Sometimes I wonder these thoughts out loud, as do my kids. We do it every day.

As we continue up the street, we turn into the neighborhood of a kid we take to school every morning. There on the sidewalk, moving slowly, arm in arm, are 4 Asian grandmothers, smiling and laughing like school girls (minus the pigtails). They all have short grey hair and wear quilted jackets in the winter to keep them warm. I love the anticipation of seeing their faces -- the wrinkled smiles, and twinkling eyes -- the camaraderie of friends who seem like they've known each other for a long, long time. "Maybe they are sisters. Maybe they have stories to tell about lands far away...." I wonder this every day.

I pull up near the middle school and see the crossing guard. The carpool cheers and starts to sing "Big Shoe Lady" which is a ditty we made up about her. Big Shoe Lady loves to wear some type of 5-inch platform shoe (usually a tennis shoe), every day. She has quite a selection. "Where does she find all those foamy platforms? How does she cross the street so gracefully in those gigantic shoes?" I wonder, as the car door slams, and the kids run across the street before Big Shoe Lady waves my car through the intersection. Big Shoe Lady is one great crossing guard. The kids love her. I love her too.

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Later in the day as I'm making my rounds .... grocery store, dry cleaners, Jack-in-the Box for a beverage..... I see a married couple: "the Patriotic Partners" out for a run. They always coordinate in some type of red, white, and blue athletic wear. They run side by side, which to a non-runner like me, seems pretty hard to do. I could never keep in sync with my husband for five miles running. Never in a million years -- unless I get bionic legs... then it might be possible. "How do they do that every single day, even in the rain? Is he a retired military officer?" I wonder.

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Finally, in the evening, I look out the window and see a small gang of children sitting in my driveway. None of them are mine, but somehow, my driveway has become the resting place for kids on wheels. The faces have changed from year to year. Old ones move out and new ones take their place, but they are always there, with bikes, or scooters, or skateboards. I like to listen to their conversations, which unusually revolve around getting someone in the group to go inside and ask for snacks. I hear this every day. It makes me smile.

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I count on these things, the constants in my life. They bring comfort to my days. But, in the last few months, my Temecula Universe shifted ..... ever so slightly. There were signs:

One morning, I pulled out of my driveway and Eden yelled: "Stop Mom!!!!!" I looked in my rear view mirror and there, right behind my car, was a guy with a black beanie on his head and a red phone in his hands. He was texting messages as he walked... oblivious to the fact that he had almost been run over. "It's Lawn Guy!!!!!" shrieked Eden, "Only he's not on the lawn, he's walking!!!!!" Sure enough, it was Lawn Guy. He walked by without eye contact, or his usual friendly nod. He was absorbed in the world of texting. "Why is he not on his lawn???? I've never seen him move!! I wondered to myself. "Is he ok????? Should I be worried?????"

I pulled into the neighborhood of our carpoolee. The sidewalk was empty.... no laughing smiles of the sister-friends walking arm in arm. "Where were the apple doll faces of the Asian Grandmothers?????"

Later in the week...... a City truck was parked in front of the middle school. Men were jack-hammering through the concrete to install a traffic signal. Before I knew it, a pole was stuck firmly in the ground, lights were turned on, and kids began crossing the street by themselves. After years of escorting back-packed hoards of children with her red Stop sign, Big Shoe Lady was gone, just like that.

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A few days later...in the evening after school, my driveway was empty. No bikes, no scooters, no kids at which to yell: "Move your stuff out of the way so I can park!"

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And today, while out and about, I saw the Patriotic Partners standing still at the side of the road. They were face to face, smiling, looking into each others eyes. Suddenly, they embraced and gave each other an oh-so-tender kiss. It was magical to be there at that exact moment. It brought tears to my eyes to witness the sweetness between a couple that has crossed my path for over 12 years. I knew they not only loved each other, they liked each other too. They parted, and continued on. But, instead of running ... they walked.

Things have shifted -- the things I thought were predictable. Lawn Guy grew up and stepped off the grass, Big Shoe Lady put her Stop sign away, and the neighborhood kids moved indoors to play WII. My world is a little off kilter. Growing up, slowing down, leaving home, school, dating, marriage, jobs, kids, retirement.... death, these things happen to us all. But, I know that change is good. Sometimes it takes a little getting used to, but when we acclimate, it brings new people into our lives, and new adventures, and new things to anticipate. And, it forces us to move -- hopefully in a direction that is good.

Create Every Day

My anxiety over New Year's Resolutions led me to forget something I need to add to my list:

4. Create Every Day

I know a truth about myself, that is hard to admit -- if I don't do this, I wither. It's happened before -- that's how I know it's true.

A few years ago, I struggled to be happy. I had trials that were hard to carry, and they weighed me down. I felt so tired, and so alone. I spent many hours on my knees pleading for answers. "Please help me find my way. Help me to be happy," I asked over and over. I had to wait a long time, but the answers eventually did come -- in an unexpected way.

It was Autumn. Temecula had just recovered from its annual heat wave. The air was cooling down and the days were getting shorter. At church we were preparing for Women's Conference. Twice a year, leaders from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints speak to it's member women all round the world via satellite broadcast from Salt Lake City. It was that time again, something I really look forward to. This particular year, however, I didn't want to go. I was tired, and sad. But, somehow I managed. I went out of obedience. And perhaps, I was also motivated by the knowledge that there was going to be a great meal afterwards -- my friends were in the church kitchen cooking, and I could smell deliciousness as I sat down in the chapel. The meeting began and I remember fiddling around with my church bag just as I heard these words by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf. I stopped and looked at the screen hanging from the rafters. His voice was kind, and powerful and I felt as if he was speaking directly to me -- Heavenly Father's words answering my pleas. I cried as I listened.

I will never forget this moment. It reminded me that I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father, who loves me, and that I am not alone in my journey on this Earth. I went home renewed. That month, I listened to the counsel of President Uchtdorf and made time every day to create. And in doing so, the fog lifted. I felt happiness, and a deep satisfaction in using my hands to make something beautiful. I now know that this need to create is something essential. I need it like I need water. It helps me through trials big and small. I know it has helped others too. Women who have survived breast cancer, women who have suffered loss. They have shared their stories with me, and I am grateful for them. They too remind me of the importance of creating ... every day. So I'm adding it to my list of resolutions because it is not yet a habit, and, it's important.

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I listened to President Uchtdorf's talk again today, because it is a new year after all. I cried, just like the first time. The words still have power, and they always will. I think I'm going to make this a January tradition. If you would like to listen this inspiring talk, click on the link below -- scroll down to the bottom and select: Happiness, Your Heritage -- on the right hand side of the screen, click on "watch": http://www.lds.org/conference/sessions/display/0,5239,49-1-947,00.html

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You'll be glad you did. Really..... you'll be glad you did.

Resolutions

It's here again.... a brand new, un-used year. Time for resolutions. Does anyone else out there feel the pressure? I don't know about you, but I spent the first night of the new year worrying. What do I want to do this year? What should I put on my list??????? I guess it wouldn't bother me so much if I actually achieved all the things I've written in years past. The problem is .... I know me. I have good intentions, but my ADHD personality has a hard time sticking to the tasks at hand. This year, I'm going to be realistic. I'm only going to commit to three things:

1. Read the scriptures every day.

2. Get outside every day.

3. Get to the temple 3 times a month.

That's it. That's what I'm going to focus on. I'm pretty sure that if I do those things, I will be a better mother, a better wife .... a better person all around.

Now, I have a suggestion for anyone out there who's wondering what they should write on their New Year's Resolution List...... "Go to Crystal's house and organize her craft room!!"

Clean Up

Worst part of the new year.......

Hauling a dead tree to the curb and putting away Christmas deorations!

Man Hobbies

This guy loves spending his vacation under the hood of a car. And by the way... that's not a mustache, it's grease. If you think his face looks bad, you should see his hands!